So it occurs to me that I've gone almost a year posting on this site without an empty recital of
God Bless America for gratuitous applause. Shame on me, people — love for a nation and its values does not a patriot make. It's an opt-in category, dammit, and you have to sing the song. So here goes:
Bobo — bring my tuning fork! And hustle! Honestly, what is an intern chimp good for? Oh, there we go. Thank you, Bobo. I didn't realize it was in your mouth. From the top then, people. Piano first, then oboe, then Bobo with the spoons. And-a-one, and-a-two, and
God bless America,
land that I love!
Stand beside her, white with FOOOOOAM —
Ah, screw it. A
link to all that hokum ought to be good enough, right? On to real content, then:
You know what? I think that if the International Society of Biscuiteers could finally agree on a design for a squid-shaped animal cracker, more people would grow up to eat
calamari. And if more of us ate calamari together, we would all be a lot happier, as a people. Write your cracker company today — tell them to get on this. It may just be the catalyst for world peace that has eluded us for so long.
and blah, blah blah, BLAH-BLAH BLAH,
my home, sweet home!
