Before the rumblings I'm reading on the Internet flower into a full-bloom media scandal, I want to take this opportunity to explain why I did not appear on this year's
Jerry Lewis telethon. The short answer is that Phutatorius & Co. just dropped the ball on this one. I took a long weekend in Columbus, Ohio to attend a great old friend's wedding, got back late last night and went through the stack of fan mail on my desk, which I review and answer as necessary every couple of months. Imagine my surprise when I saw the half-dozen unopened envelopes from the Muscular Dystrophy Association, postmarked as early as May 15! It appears that the intern who screens my mail put these invitations in the "fan" pile, and not the "business" pile, which I address on a daily basis. I implore you not to rush to judgment, good readers: I swear to you that had I seen any of these invitations in time to do the gig, I would have cleared my calendar.
And Jerry, I know you have scheduling deadlines to meet and that the August gear-up is a particularly busy and stressful time for you, but I have to say I resent both the tone and implications of your last letter. We go too far back for you to be writing some of the things that you did.
You can rest assured that this bureaucratic snafu will be discussed at our next staff meeting, and that a generous donation will makes its way to the MDA before the end of the fiscal year.
